The dark side of the Law of Attraction
Oct 13th, 2008 by QuirkyVegan
I’m guessing that if you’re reading this post, you have more than a passing interest in personal growth, self-development, raising your consciousness level, call it what you will. And as such, you will have heard many wax lyrical about The Secret and the Law of Attraction. As with anything that “everyone” is talking about, there is a lot of total rubbish spouted about it.
Now, I’m not so much bashing the underlying premise of the Law of Attraction, which in a nutshell is: You become what you think. You attract that which you imagine. You create your own reality. Even if you don’t buy that you create your experiences in life, you would have to concede that you create your experiences of life.
The Secret is definitely creating an experience of wealth for Rhonda Byrne, the book and DVD have been best sellers all over the world, which probably says more about the number of people who are seeking than the material itself. In my opinion the real success of the Secret is down to the fact that as a TV writer, Byrne had access to all the right media contacts, and The Secret DVD
Rhonda Byrne’s discovery of The Secret began with a glimpse of the truth through a 100 year old book. She went back through centuries, tracing and uncovering a common truth that lay at the core of the most powerful philosophies, teachings and religions in the world.
Truly amazing. This wealth of knowledge was waiting for all this time for an Aussie chick to “discover” it and create a best seller and cultish belief system. What was this amazing book she discovered? Well, that’s a secret of course*. The Secret is based on an old self-help book and some clever media spin. Nice way to make $12 million a year.
Appealing to greed and selfishness
It bugs me that this Secret is designed to appeal to people’s lower selves. Sadly, I think a lot of its success is related to this point. Sure, who doesn’t want more money, better health, romance? But to do this in sort of vacuum where one’s own personal growth is ignored is folly. Be careful what you wish for, you might just get it. You may attract a lottery win, but will it fulfill you? Do you want to “win the lotto” or do you want the financial freedom it will give you? What would you do with that freedom? Would it make you happy? It is human to want things, but things are only forms. Let go of the form and think about the essence of what you want to attract.
The Dark side of the Law of Attraction
The thing that disturbs me about people who are really into the Law of Attraction is that they can become judgemental and blinkered. I don’t think this is the essence of the Law of Attraction, but more down to misunderstanding. The LoA is neutral. You attract back what you put out into the universe. I can go with that. The dark side is the extrapolation of some of the concepts that lead to erroneous perceptions of the world around us. For example, sickness and illness. Some people believe that the person has attracted the illness into their own life, and therefore it is their own fault. Worse than that, I have read accounts where someone has a friend who is suffering some kind of misfortune, be it financial, romantic, health related, and the person has actually shunned their “friend” because they don’t want to be infected by their negativity. How compassionate! How caring! If they really understood about the Law of Attraction they would know that by ostracising their former friend, they are telling the universe that they don’t want people to care about them. But I guess that’s OK, because <insert difficult circumstance here> would never happen to them as they would only attract positive stuff into their lives. Get over your ego, people!
I’m not saying that you shouldn’t seek out people who have a higher vibration than yourself. If you want to improve with anything, the first thing you should do is find someone who does it better than you. By the same token, there is nothing wrong with parting company with negative people who do nothing but drag you down. What I am talking about is abandoning a true friend in their hour of need. The Law of Attraction is not about that.
The real secret is that sometimes life is hard
But that doesn’t sell books 
Personal growth is not simply about thinking happy thoughts. You need to develop your inner belief that you will succeed, but denying the hard parts of life is not the way to do that. Do not regard any hardships that you or others around you as a failure to “do” the Secret or Law of Attraction correctly. Whether you accept that you attracted them or not, such challenges are an integral part of your soul’s journey, lessons that you must learn in this lifetime. You can’t short-circuit life’s experiences with some so-called Secret. The real secret is that you must learn from all life’s experiences, the joyful and the painful. You don’t succeed in the game of life despite your challenges, but because of them.
* Only kidding. If you are interested, the book Byrne discovered was The Science of Getting Rich
Hi Kate,
Thanks for sharing your point of view. That’s quite true from marketing perspective.
But there’s no doubt that the Law of Attraction has help me a lot in enriching my life.
I agree with you about the book. It really was an amazing marketing ploy. Personally, I had already heard of and was doing my best to practice the law of attraction when the movie came out. That was my first exposure to the “Secret” was through the movie.
I have to disagree with you about the dark side of law of attraction. You DO attract disease and illness and tragedy into your life. I’m not saying that you do it on purpose, but the thoughts you think attract your life circumstances. If someone chooses to abandon a friend in their time of need, that’s THEIR choice. They attracted the experience of having a friend in need as much as the friend attracted the illness. There’s something they’re both supposed to take away from the experience. If they fail to grasp the lesson, it’ll just reappear in their lives again in another form for a redo. The law of attraction isn’t about getting stuff to make you happy. If you think it is, you’ll be one of those disappointed people who thinks LOA doesn’t work.
Law of Attraction is like religion. It’s simply a state where you ask God (or the Universe, or source, or your Higher Self etc..) for help with whatever it is you’re wishing to acheive or have and then let go and have faith that’s it’s coming to you. But it’s also a play on quantum physics which has proven that all matter is vibrating molecuels of energy and that like energy attracts like energy. So basically, Law of Attraction is where religion and science meet and agree. They key to LOA is consciousness. Using the Law of Attraction and actually manifesting what you desire is REALLY easy. I do it daily and am still in awe at the way the Universe works. But the success you have will depend on your level of consciousness. The more conscious you are, the faster and more precisely it works.
The Universe loves everyone equally. No matter what you think or believe, the Universe sends it to you. Your entire life as it is right now, was created piece by piece…. by YOU. You molded it with what you thought about yourself and others. DO you leave the house 5 minutes behind and say… “Oh that figures. I’m always late. People must think I’m an idiot!”? Most people do… then they feel bad for themselves because they’re always late and people think they’re an idiot. Anything you think about, the Universe is working on sending it to you as soon as you start thinking about it. So I guess LOA is more about getting a grip of your brain and it’s rampage of thought.
You’re going to receive the thoughts you think in form… why not think thoughts about what you DO want instead of critisizing yourself and others and creating disharmony in your life.
I tried to explain the Laws of Attraction to a friend of mine and failed, I’m just going to point them at your article instead - thanks, well written.
Oh my goodness, where to start. Do you feel a bit like the little boy telling the emperor he has no clothes on?
It seems to me that these self-fulfilling beliefs are a little like the three wishes that the genie in the bottle will give you. If you wish ‘wrong’ you could be in a whole lotta trouble!
I am not sure that the universe is neutral, for I do feel a powerful amount of love when I let it come through. But I also believe we are all small children in a very big playground. Sometimes we will stumble and scrape a knee, but get up and keep playing anyway. The only time we really lose is if we sit fearful in the corner and just observe others having fun experiencing life!
I know that the mind and the body are interconnected, so that stress can make us ill. Powerful diseases like cancer can sometimes be a metaphor for what is going wrong in our lives. But do we have the power to call bad things to us? Nah, I don’t think so. That egocentric concept just doesn’t fit with my humble impression of where we fit in the universe!
GREAT post. Really got me thinking! M.
I have been a proponent of positive thinking since my Dad studied the writings of Napoleon Hill many years ago. I do believe your thoughts can help you and that you can be proactive in wellness.
I have been in the medical field over 38 years. One thing I know is that the universe is random. That is the one constant - chaos.
I don’t care what you think you are going to get old and die. There are some principles you can apply that will help you and positive self talk is one of them. This is not mystical. There is no secret after you hear about it. These mystical beliefs were necessary because knowledge was so much less years ago and people suffered much more and had less opportunity.
We want to believe in a higher power and that we can control this chaos. It is the basis of religion - a higher power will “protect us”.
Well maybe that is true. I believe very strongly that you sow and then you reap. The harvest is slow in coming but good or bad it will arrive. Occasionally there is hail, drought, wind, flood, and lots of insect pests. These are part of the chaos. You don’t attract or repel them. The bigger the crop you plant the better you store it the more you will have in tough times as well as plenty. We are as a group much more like the grasshopper in the story rather than
the ant. Bad things happen to good people and to bad people. Compassion for the plight of others, lending a helping hand, being a friend when your friend is in need are important concepts. Those who are of the hard opinion that they brought it on themselves will find themselves without friends some day even among their family and no amount of health, material gain or success will compensate for being alone. One description of heaven and hell I read described both as a banquet. Everyone dressed in their finest but with a knife or fork strapped permanently to each arm. Those in Hell were gaunt, unhappy, thin and just sitting there. Those in Heaven were happy, laughing, well fed and having a good time because they fed each other.
I’m a great believer in positive thinking, I think affirmations and visualization can be very useful tools for personal development. But talk of a “Law” of attraction is just twaddle, there is no scientific justification for such claims. Proponents quote quantum physics, but there is no evidence that by sending out magnetic vibrations we can influence events - and get a parking space!!
But if others find it useful, fine, so long as they do no harm to others (or start suggesting those suffering disease or famine haven’t been thinking properly).
Thanks. An excellent critique. The marketing hype around this whole thing is really pretty awful I think. And it is old stuff recycled. Many books have been written around these concepts.
I’d like to push you a bit though to present your alternative more clearly.
My concern is about compassion and where it fits in the ‘they made that reality’ approach. I think this sounds like your major concern too. So I’d like to hear more about how you approach this stuff (even if - like me - you feel a bit confused).
While I believe there is truth to the Law of Attraction, it does not exist in a vacuum. Few people who are promoting the Secret and the practices seem to have considered the other elements that are invariably at play in the process of manifestation, namely, the influence of the subconscious mind. Through my experience as a hypnotherapist, it is clear that attracting what one wants is impossible if all one’s past patterns prevent it. The subconscious takes up about 99.9% of one’s mind on days when one feels fairly clear and in control! This part of the mind is meticulously recording the past, forming ones decisions, and shaping one’s beliefs in an effort to make sure one survives. Clearly, the conscious mind, that part that could practice the LoA, is at a huge disadvantage. If the LoA is not working for someone (”positive” experiences are not manifesting), it’s not necessarily because he or she just wasn’t trying hard enough, or is just a negative person, but because the mental patterns that have been forming since infancy are preventing it. We all have patterns that formed when those choices seemed like the best chance at making it through another day. I would like to see the LoA move from a largely materialistic practice, to one that encourages people to come together with compassion and intention for the greatest good. Also, one that helps ignite a passion to look at the deeper issues that may be preventing one’s experience of a vibrant life. If LoA is not working for you (you’re not getting what your conscious mind think’s it wants), there’s reason to rejoice. There is gold beneath the surface. It’s your opportunity to look deep into what is really holding you back. A band-aid is temporary. Heal the wound and move beyond.
Hi Kate,
Great thought provoking post! I agree alot is old news redesigned. And I do agree some I am completely aligned with and resonated to.
Though the part you have trouble with does bother me to… and I have found these principles also amongst the saints as wel? But here the problem a young innocent child gets cancer is it his will? his thoughts? that attracts this disease? Is it the energy of the home? If the secret was an absolute truth then each of us manifest a destiny with complete power from the moment of birth? A mother and father then lives with grief and loss the rest of their lives? And casting out others would seem somewhat appropriate? And what about guilt? And what about the sweetest classic true story epics? They show compassion and stick through the most unsurmountable odds and thrive. I am with you on this one. A person going through some kind of suffering introduced to the secret may actually be more guilt ridden afterwards. And say you see it is my fault its the way I think the way I am…. See! So I applaud your post on the darker side of LOA. Interesting in hospitals the first thing they say to a patient i s its not your fault…its a disease but yes there is these things you can do for better chance to survive this…and the lists of those include attitude, life style change, etc. But some visualization experts say not to own it but to visualize the ability to zap it or see it shrinking, etc. The fine lines between accountability and blaming oneself. Could you imagine thinking your very own child has decided to have cancer and die, and accepting that as reality based? That thought is frightening. Or the great yogi’s that have died from tumors who once proved on TV that they could become breathless 20 years ago. It’s just so very thought provoking isn’t it?