Experiments in Living

The infamous Twitter “fail whale”

Over the last few years, it appears that the word “fail” has become unspeakable, especially in the education world. Educators are told that use of the word discourages students, and in the wider world, we fear failure. I believe that be hiding from anything that may result in failure, we do ourselves a disservice. How many times did you ever have an idea or a dream, but never did anything about it because you thought you might not succeed? What if you changed your reality so that failure was no big deal, simply a lesson to be learnt? Can you see the possibilities opening up before your eyes?

Failure is deferred success

When I was a college student, I had a male friend, let’s call him Brad, who never had a shortage of gorgeous girls lined up, girls way hotter than me, if you can believe that. Now Brad was a great guy, a great friend, but nothing more. And he certainly wasn’t good-looking in any conventional sense. After about six months of observing this revolving door of ladies, I had to ask him how he did it. So here’s Brad’s secret:

I see a girl and think “she looks nice” so I ask her out. If she says no, no big deal. Then I see another girl I’d like to get to know. so I ask her out. Even if I get knocked back by ten girls and then one says yes, I’ve still got a date.

Makes sense, but how many of us sit on the sidelines of life afraid to ask because we’ll get knocked back?

Failure shows that you’re a success in the making

Think about it - if you’ve failed at something, it means that you gave it a go and you put some effort in. This is true whether it is trying a new sport and deciding it’s not for you, or failing at something much bigger such as an important exam, a relationship or a career. How many people wouldn’t even take on the challenge? My experience as a classroom teacher ended in failure after three years, but I know many people who would never even entertain the idea of teaching. I am not ashamed to say that I failed at my chosen career, because as it turned out, teaching was a springboard into the work I am doing now, advising young people on jobs and careers.

Failure gives your life a spring clean

Have you ever been dumped by a boyfriend or girlfriend and thought it was the worst thing ever and the world was ending, only to end up feeling grateful to them for vacating your life and leaving room for a better relationship? Failure is not the end, it is merely a difficult step we have to get over in order to improve our lives.

Facing failure head on takes courage

As part of my job, I see many students who change their plans during their time at college. There is still such a huge stigma to dropping out of a course or failing an exam, but why? We all have hopes, desires, dreams, plans (thank goodness), but as someone once said, “Life happens when you’re making other plans”. If things aren’t working out the way you would have liked, then that’s your inner bell sounding a wake-up call. Facing up to the fact that something needs to change is the hardest part and you must have the courage to do that for yourself. Life change is hard work. The good news is that once you have taken that step, there’s plenty of help out there, and you can find yourself in a better position to move forward.

Failure teaches you humility

It does you good to stuff up now and again. To be in that position where you have to back down and say “I got it wrong”. People respect people who are not afraid to make mistakes and admit to their mistakes. Who wants to be right all the time anyway?

If you’ve ever failed, you’re in good company

Enjoy this short YouTube video.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y6hz_s2XIAU]

If you’ve never failed, you’ve never lived.

 

 

Tags: change, commitment, courage, denial, failure, growth, lifehacks, personal development, success